Wednesday, April 11, 2012

All that he is.

My adjustment to motherhood was not easy, mostly because I had such a different vision of what motherhood would be and who my son would be as a baby. He would be a sleeper and I would be superwoman able to get it all done. I would be one of those mothers who makes organic baby food and takes her easy going child everywhere. Ah... rose colored glasses. Or perhaps first time mother syndrome?

I've slowly learned to embrace it all.

The good.

The bad.

The ugly.

Mostly because what choice did I have?

Even during my overwhelming moments I still had a baby to nurse, a diaper to change, or a cry that needed a cuddle. 

But bottom line, I wasn't the mother I wanted to be because my baby wasn't the baby I thought he'd be. Does that make sense?  I HATED the baby stage oh so much. The give and give and give that a baby demands was almost too much for me.

But I realize now was that during the baby stage I was laying the foundation.

Malone is now a toddler morphing into a preschooler he is exactly who I thought he'd be. He is smart and curious, full of adventure and funny. He wants to go on adventures and read books.

So, I'm finally feeling like the mother I was meant to be. I can do all of these things, and I can do them well.  Even during those moments of toddler turning three power struggles and limit testing, I shine as a mother.

But a part of me feels so guilt for hating the baby stage so much.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Spring Bucket List

Mother Nature can't seem to make up her mind.We've already had a heat streak with temps in the upper 80's but now it is cold again with a lot of wind. I am afraid that April showers might actually be April snowstorms.

In any case, Spring is here, or at least that is what my calendar says. So, I've decided to make a bucket list of things to do this spring. I wonder how many I'll be able to check off my list.

Spring 2012 Bucket List.

Family Goals
  1.  Renew our seasonal park passes. We usually get a State Park pass as well as a pass to a nearby park that has mini golf, two great playgrounds, a splash pad, a train, bumper boats, and lots of tables to picnic at.
  2.  Take Malone on a hike. I am not a hiker so this will be out of my comfort zone a bit. However, Mike loves to hike. Also, I am afraid of ticks which are everywhere out here.
  3. Go on at least four outings/play dates with another family.
  4. Attend church on a regular basis as  family.
Marriage Goals
  1. Have a monthly date with my husband.
  2. Start taking my friends up on their babysitting swap offers. 
  3. Plan an overnight date with my husband. 
Me Goals
  1. Complete the Couch to 5k running plan.
  2.  Run a 5k
  3. Blog more three times a week. 
  4. Become more intentional with my spare time.
  5. Complete 3 craft projects. 
  6. Buy a sewing machine.
  7. Learn how to use my new camera.
  8. Deliver more meals to those new mamas, those in crisis or sick, or those who just would enjoy a night of not having to cook.
Family Travel Goals 
  1. Take a day trip to Boston.
  2. Take a day trip to NYC. 
  3. Plan our summer beach trips to the Cape. 
  4. Plan our next visit back to my hometown in Illinois.
Home Goals
  1.  Start a compost bin. We don't have a yard or garden to use for compost but recently I learned I can take compost to Whole Foods.
  2. Research and purchase biodegradable trash bags.
  3. Get smarter about meal planning. Freeze more meals.
  4. Cull through the clutter. 
  5.  Have a tag sale.
  6. Create a household binder. 
  7.  Decorate the Master Bedroom.
Misc. Goals
  1. Start planning Malone's 3rd birthday party.
  2. Start a savings plan to get Mike's fancy road bike he's been dreaming about.
  3. Get Malone fully comfortable using the potty 100% of the time during the day (we're so close).